It took less than 48 hours after taking my last Neurontin for the severe nerve pain in my nerves to return to the more normal state of tenderness. Clearly not a coincidence. While I'm relieved and even a bit excited to have that behind me, I'm feeling the loss of the antidepressants I was taking earlier.
You may remember how excited I was to have an appetite and to have gained some weight during the first quarter of the year while I was taking Amitriptyline. I really thought (and still think) that despite all the wonderful benefits I experienced on this medication that there were so many others to try that may make more of an impact on my migraines without so many of the bad side effects. So far that hasn't worked out but there is still other meds and Botox to try.
In the weeks since I've been off it, I've been increasingly returning to my pre-Amitriptyline relationship with food. The nausea is ever present, I'm not craving specific foods, I don't have the will to do much cooking or baking and I'm just not enjoying food. The only thing that is different now, after a few months of good appetite and weight gain, my body is used to having lots of food so I'm still very hungry all the time. The war is now raging between my hunger and my lack of appetite and will.
What's interesting is that part of this war is about preparing and cleaning up after preparing a meal. I feel sluggish and physically beat down, which makes the business of food a real challenge. While I'm going to continue to search for the best migraine preventative I think I might also launch a search for a different antidepressant. It really helped me to feel more like myself (premigraine self). I had almost forgotten what that felt like and having that taste has just made me want it more.